Saturday, April 26, 2014

Quotes about Positive Affirmations (per www..bemindful.com)

"You become what you think about most of the time."-- Brian Tracy

"Every action and feeling is preceded by a thought."-- James Allen

"The Ancestor of every action is a thought."-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." -- Proverbs 23:7

"When you miss a shot, never think of what you did wrong. Take the next shot thinking what you must do right." --Tony Alfonso




Tuesday, April 22, 2014

In Turning 40...

In turning 40, I feel overwhelmed. I have been coming to terms with a lot in my life. I've been coming to terms with a lot of losses. I am learning to let go of what doesn't feel right anymore to embrace what does. My identity has played a major role in this process, as I've been exploring the un-mundane, the I'm-not-settling-for-less aspects of me.

I'm missing parts of me. My family means the world to me and I don't have them by my side. They were taken from me abruptly and I'm learning to deal with the losses better. I know that my brothers would want me to be happy and strong and not to hide but to live, dare I say, FEARLESSLY. (Note: Not so long ago, a man who left an impact on me said to me "be smart; don't hide---->be yourself." It left an impact because it is exactly what I've been wanting to do, but I was indecisive. I need to embrace all that I am and integrate it with what I want to see in the world, right here, right now. This is decision. Decision is power. At this point in time, I feel exhausted but I am angry too. So I need to be more proactive in my way of dealing with situations that could force me to be out of character.  Patience is a virtue and vice versa and I've learned to remain grounded during some very disturbing times.

These experiences are shaping me as well. There are some horrors that I cannot describe that I have learned to overcome that bring me to be who I am today. In some ways I feel stronger than before, not as vulnerable, inexperienced, raw or weak. In other ways I am learning (to cope with) something new. I want to live and thrive, not just survive. In reclaiming myself and in reclaiming autonomy in my own life, I own up to who I am, to whom I should have been, or could have been long ago, had I opened my eyes, [my I's],  sooner. At 40 -I couldn't believe that I'd make it to 40 years of age around this time last year- I'm happy for having found the strength to keep on keeping on in spite of harrowing circumstances.

For this I thank God, as I am grateful for where I'm at, what I've done and what I have accomplished, for loving my family so much, for good people, and for finding renewed meaning to my life after I lost them. They gave me hope. I love you, Dear Lord, and thanks. :)  Sylvia

Thursday, April 17, 2014

Book for the Day: Why We Hate, by Jack Levin and Ordana Rabrenovic

"Great Spirits have always been opposed by violent opposition."--from a famous leader


"Expressions of hate are trumpeted each evening on the news, from the mayhem unleashed by suicide bombers to the steadily increasing casualties in the Middle East and Iraq. And since September 11, Americans have repeatedly asked themselves    "why do they hate us?".... In this in-depth look at the most troubling aspect of human nature, Jack Levin  - nationally recognized criminologist- and Gordana Rabrenovic - a respected sociologist - seek to explain why hate exists and offer practical methods for creating a more peaceable society.

"Are we born with the tendency to hate, or is it something we learn? Does educating people necessarily reduce hate? Looking at biological, psychological, and cultural factors, Drs. Levin and Rabrenovic investigate the evidence for hate as an inborn trait; as learned behavior; and as a reaction to envy, frustration, or the need to belong, control and authority.

"These highly regarded experts reveal their new, original and sometimes surprising findings on hate among Americans, as well as the way the media can be manipulated to foster and intensify hatred. They also consider the phenomena of anti-Americanism and Anti-Semitism before and after September 11, 2014, in addition to anti-muslim sentiments in the wake of the attack on the Twin Towers and the Pentagon. Also discussed are domestic terrorism and *organized hate* in the form of white supremacist and civilian militia groups.

"Finally, in scrutinizing the many troubled 'hot spots' around the world where hate is an explosive issue, including Northern Ireland, Levin and Rabrenovic describe a series of inspiring situations that show astonishing cooperation between ethnic groups who have transcended hate. They explain how such peaceful coexistence has been achieved and can be achieved elsewhere in the future. Both enlightening and insightful, this probing and timely work offers hope human beings can behave in a civilized manner toward their fellow humans and come to grips with an age-old problem.

"Chapter 2: Hate as Violence

"Frustration increases the likelihood that an individual will turn violent. People who cannot fulfill their goals and are dissatisfied with their lives may decide to strike back against those they regard as responsible for their plight. Yet violence is often aimed not at the true source of the frustration, but at an innocent target. 'When the source of our difficulties is very powerful or difficult to identify or both, we tend to redirect or displace our anger to some innocent target, especially a target that is both visible and vulnerable. In other words, [they] tend to attack someone who is easily identifiable and likely incapable of striking back.' "[this happened to my brother Jose Antonio Morelos, dob: 06/06/75. He was racially profiled a lot. Good kid. He was murdered as an adult by extremists in Arizona.)



* Other books: Hate Crimes Revisited, the Violence of Hate






Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness

Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness is a "well-known phrase in the Declaration of Independence. The phrase gives examples of the various inalienable rights which the Declaration says all human beings have been given by their Creator and for the protection of which they institute governments," per Wikipedia.

Book for the Day: A Crowd of One, the Future of Individual Identity, John Henry Clippinger

I have read the first 3 chapters of this book. Highly recommended.


"There is no such thing as a noble savage, we are a crowd of one."


On Trust and Reciprocity:

"It is a pursuit of the ultimate virtuous cycle that might under the right conditions yield trust, reciprocity, and the will to not go to war." John Henry Clippinger


The Future of Individual Identity:

  • civil discourse

"We really are a crowd of one - and one in a crowd."

"Modern identity is an open wound in need of healing."

"...a just and stable social order..."


Chapter 3:

Terrorism's Shattered Identities

"What becomes 'true' in such conflicts is what is believed to be true: the managed perception becomes the reality."

"...[a] self-justifying reality."

"An asymmetric adversary's effectiveness...its legitimacy depends upon the credibility and coherence of the narratives. Anything that diminishes their credibility weakens their will and viability."

*"Using disinformation and propaganda as a weapon is anathema to most democratic societies because many believe that if their governments become engaged in distorting information of any kind, even in the pursuit of national security, their countries would soon cease to be democratic."

*information warfare capabilities
*information-related operations play an increasingly vital role in achieving global security
*perception management, [i.e. propaganda]

"controlled savagery"
"shaved awareness"

"perception management campaign


*****"So-called terrorist organizations such as Hezbolla and Hamas are succeeding in part because they give their recruits a sense of purpose and belonging, and place their struggles within a larger, mythic, religious context."


Sunday, April 13, 2014

Reclaiming Autonomy: A Woman's Manifesto (A Work in Progress, Part 1)

MANIFESTO: n. A public declaration, usually of a sovereign or person claiming large powers, showing intentions and motives; [a statement of such a policy].

AUTONOMY: n. The quality or state of being autonomous; right of self-government; a governing-state.

SELF-REALIZATION: n. Fulfillment by oneself of the possibilities of one's character or personality.

SELF-POSSESSION: control or command over one's powers; self-command; presence of mind; composure.

SELF-IDENTITY: The identity of a thing with itself; identity of subject and object in life and consciousness.

SELF-EXAMINATION: Examination into one's own state, conduct and motives; introspection.

SELF-DETERMINATION: Determination of one's acts by oneself without external compulsion.

INDIVIDUAL: Not divisible; one's own essence, inseparable, identical; arising from a distinct entity.

*INDIVIDUALISM: Individuality, personality. An individual peculiarity; idiosyncrasy. **Any doctrine or practice based on the assumption that the individual and not society is the paramount consideration or end; A theory maintaining that individual initiative, action, and interests should b e independent of government or *social control*. 

INDIVIDUATION: Process by which an individual develops his or its peculiar character. Personal or individual existence. The development of the individual from the universal; or the determination of the individual in general.

INDIVIDUATE: To endow with individuality.


******************************************************

My name is Sylvia Lydia Morelos. I was born on April 20, 1974 at 4:29 a.m. in Westwood, Ca (UCLA Medical Center). I am a college graduate (UCLA --ha! I came full circle!), class of '03, and I have a BA in Latin American Studies. 

I have been going through a process of introspection and reflection. I have been feeling a lot. I have been coming to terms with some things (experiences mostly). Autonomy means a lot to me. In writing on Reclaiming Autonomy, I will be dividing this into a few sections: the meaning of autonomy, what it means to have autonomy and exercise it as a woman, and On Being 40 (Early Midlife Crisis?), and what my goals are from here. 

Reclaiming autonomy over:


  • My OWN body rights
  • My OWN faith or spirituality
  • My OWN pain
  • My OWN feelings
  • My OWN thoughts
  • My OWN space
  • My OWN reproductive rights
  • My OWN freedom
  • My OWN finances
  • My OWN property
  • My OWN gun rights
  • My OWN outlook on life
  • My OWN foresight
  • My OWN decisions
  • My OWN relationships (friendships, family, etc.)
  • My OWN intellectual property
  • My OWN lifestyle
  • My OWN livelihood.

I am a work in progress.







It doesn't end with Bundy (+playlist)

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Saturday, April 5, 2014

Books for Thought....

04/05/14...2:51 p.m.

I'm at the library and I've been looking up words in the dictionary (i.e. Individual) and I will post what I've done on here eventually. In the meantime, I am going to post books that I figure will do some good for those who are interested in greasing the wheels and flexing a muscle a bit. Exercise: think.

Books for Thought:

*1. When Sorry Isn't Enough: The Controversy Over Apologies and Reparations for Human Injustice. Edited by Roy L. Brooks, This anthology brings together essays, written by both internationally renowned and emerging scholars, and public documents concerning claims from around the world that seek redress for human injustice."

*2. The Power Elite... "first published in 1956,  stands as a contemporary classic of social science and social criticism." Re: the organization of power in the United States, re: the military, corporate, and political elite. *The Power Elite can be read as an accurate account of what was taking place in America at the time it was written, its underlying question of whether America is as democratic in practice as it is in theory is every bit as significant to the culture of today." "The Power Elite stimulates us to think about the kind of society we have and the kind of society we might want."

3. The Official Guide to American Attitudes "Who Thinks What About the Issues that Shape Our Lives,"  by Susan Mitchell









Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Music and the Life It Brings...."Strictly Rythm"... Dance, Maestro.... :)


Sarah McLachlan  -Sweet Surrender



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REM  -Losing My Religion



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I Won't Back Down - Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers





Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Disarm: Be Yourself, Live a Little.

"Knowledge of the self is the mother of all knowledge. 
So it is incumbent on me to know [my self], to know it 
completely, to know its minutiae, its characteristics, its 
subtleties, its atoms."--Khalil Gibran



What makes me tick? This is a question that I have needed to come to terms with for years now. I'm always questioning, always curious, always looking. I have been looking over my shoulder constantly for a while and lost track of who I was. I even cut off my long, waist-length hair last year because of my fears. I became used to living on the defensive and began building up walls to forget about my flaws; I felt "safer" (lie?) and more "comfortable" (lie.)

In the process of feeling "safer", I just stopped feeling. I became automated with responses to pain [as in, "I've a high threshold for pain (unfortunately, is what I meant)." I became aloof ("I'm used to it.") Careless, even. I was unforgiving of the wrongs done to me, I think I still am to some degree ("I'm still working on it."---stubborn me.) Anger is what I began to feel after a while, when I "came to," so-to-speak.

I realized - and through the direction of a few kind people - that I needed to deal with myself and face me. I was running all over the place with my head cut off and it finally fell off ("Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair!") - snicker, snicker (me, always joking around). I also felt that I needed a safe place where I could fall apart and heal. Healing is the key word here. Communicating and reaching out are how I had (have) to do so.

Introspection takes time. Reflection heals, it's edifying. Not running from my feelings and fears and looking them straight in the I was a wake-up call. And I found a place to be still safely, in the process. It doesn't hurt as much. ("Coward," I just called myself. Wow. I can be pretty hard on myself.) I needed to take control of my life, so I began to nurture myself, my talents (i.e. writing, creativity, speech). I've been nurturing my mind, my body (i.e. healing one's body entails being good to it by properly eating (nutrition), sleeping (seven to eight hours), hygiene (daily showers). I suffered a Metatarsal Fracture on my left foot, left toe two years ago from a hit-and-run (a white van ran into me) and it never fully healed. The left side of my foot is protruding a bit, and I have a difficult time walking on heels. (My left ankle swells up right away.) I massage my foot gently and compassionately at times to give it the love it deserves. "A body is a body is a body, it's just a technicality, I'll recover." This is the chant that I would use to help me feel better about my broken body or body parts and from whatever misery I was put through, "I can handle it." (...) But I realized later how brutal this was to me, as I ignored my frailty to begin with. I'm not superwoman, though, but I am/was (?) proud of standing up for myself and getting back on my feet, pun intended. My literal physical growth is as important as my intellectual growth and I needed to make sure that I took the time to carefully care for my body. "Nurturing, loving care for my bodacious body," I'd started joking, needing to be kind to myself. (smile). I deserve(d) it.

Unbeknownst to me I became raw inside and I wanted to run in the opposite direction at first. Innately at least. "I'm not used to it, I don't like it ," (it hurts). I began to really feel when I began to focus on the real. (ME). Oh My God, it hurt.

...So reflection and introspection are processes that I put myself through, now, conscientiously, every day. Getting in touch with the real me, in spite of my vulnerability and fears, the rawness inside, the frailty of me all. I was able to reach out to people who mattered, people who were humane, loving people, beautiful nurturing people who have been responding back too, in their own manner. They are few. I can count them on one hand.

I used to brag that I could "talk the talk and walk the walk." I still need to complete this dance. Do the fox trot. Just do it. (wink.) That sort of deal. I oftentimes pride myself on taking the bull by the horns but I needed to feel in the process, not just shut myself out with distractions and with jokes too (i.e. kinda-maybe-sorta-but-not-really sort of mentality, ya know? snicker, snicker.)

People. I need to reach out to people. They are a part of who I am and are a part of who I am becoming; it takes two ta tango! (GRIN). People who impart and share, people who do not break down in toxicity claims, people who don't take away, who do not reduce nor detract. In short, people who don't stress me the heck out.

I'm coming to terms with the mundane inside of me. What I have always wanted to do but was "...lost by indecision" in doing so. Right now, I feel vulnerable, but I feel. I feel vulnerable in a good way. I have been able to rest and to nurture myself, and the kindest of friends have helped bring me to this point. I still have fears, mind you, fears that have nothing to do with them. And I did not know that I have them. Writing the fears down and opening up, even to just myself, helps me a great deal. I have a sense of responsibility to lay it out out there, my feelings/insights/knowledge/talents, etc. and to share. I enjoy it, being true to myself. Integrity means a lot to me, so do honesty and ethics. The most difficult part is being honest to one's self. On a consistent basis, not just sporadically. You can't really grow sporadically if you want to be honest with yourself, and this may be a matter of discussion. Relative.

Conversation is what I crave as well. ("I've been praying for intelligent conversation and laughter for years now, so I talk to myself." snicker, snicker.) Letting it out, what I believe, without being too self-centered, too one-sided. A rapport with witty banterers? Dare I ask? :)

I'm conscientious, but I've forgotten my manners in some respects (having two left feet again am I?) I need to work on this. Every day I noticed or will notice things that I need to work on without being too hard on myself, without trying to be too judgmental.

...I'm a work in progress.  


Sylvia Lydia Morelos


Rage Against the Machine - Killing in the Name Of...

Reclaiming Autonomy: A Woman's Manifesto (A Work in Progress)

Manifesto: A public declaration, usually of a sovereign or person claiming large powers, showing intentions and motives; [a statement of such a policy].

Autonomy: n. A quality or state of being autonomous; right of self-government; a governing state.

Self-Define/Word of the Day: 

EMULATE:


"Emulate courage, fearlessness and letting go of the past." --Sylvia Lydia Morelos


"You Gotta Be...", by Des'ree

Depeche Mode- "Policy of Truth" HQ + Lyrics....Good Music