I've survived a lot. I had a great deal of difficulty getting back on my feet because of the circumstances that were beyond my control sometimes. I've been asked a couple of things: "why do you even bother?" and "how do you do it.?"
Good questions. During the worst periods of my life I often felt alone and problems (to put it mildly) could have been insurmountable. But I turned inward; I had an innate sense of my self worth and knew that my pain was valid and that I was invaluable. It helped me block the malice of the outside world out when I looked within: "I began to feel when I focused on the real. (me)" (Oh my God, it hurt.)
When you're younger and inexperienced and vulnerable to harrowing circumstances, it hurts a lot when you don't know what to do at first. All I knew was that I matter(ed) and that God matter(ed). "You will be hated because of me," said the Lord. It helped me get back up every time. Comparing the malice on the outside to what I was inside and to what He is, really helped. Grounding myself in my core values was what I ended up learning how to do. You can weather anything after a while ("to weather the weather vanes", I thought to myself." You become stronger, centered. You begin to laugh at the malice in the outside world. "You can be in the world, but not of the world", He said. (Don't isolate.) He said.
I began to read Sarah Young, Jesus Calling when I was older; two years now and counting and she hasn't let me down: "[t]he daughter of a college professor, I had been encouraged to read widely and think for myself", Sarah Young. This is my motto too: "think for yourself, just do it." She helped deeply wounded women and I could relate back then. Still do.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future", Sarah Young, Jesus Calling. This made sense to me. When I was younger and I was diligently reading scripture while undergoing trials, I didn't realize that I was angry with Him. When someone wanted to pray with me, I walked away in anger. But it wasn't intentional. I did it more often than once and it bothered me after a while. (I never hated Him; I just couldn't understand my anger.) I called a friend, Laura, and asked her "Is it normal to be angry with God? (Why am I angry?)" She told me "maybe you didn't realize that He was there for you the entire time, [and got you through.]" SHOCK!
I think I regained my faith that day. "...[I]t was then that I carried you." (Footsteps, the Lord). I was in shock to realize He was there the entire time. Laura was very comforting to me. I haven't turned on Him (because that's what it feels like I did) since then. So every time something painful and malicious happened to me, I turned to Him; it's second nature now. No question.
Strength comes from within and without (Him). I am limited as a human being, and I am ok with it. Control freakiness is not healthy for me nor is it realistic. Catastrophising doesn't help. Predicting the future is not normal. (It's not the same thing as extrapolating or planning ahead.) One day at a time. "Nurture yourself" (I told myself.) I am valuable (and He loves me!) Unconditionally. "Persistence is what He looks for, not perfection." That's being human, and being humane to myself. I learned all of this from reading Sarah Young, Jesus Calling, and a healer of deeply wounded women. It resonated.
It's discipline that matters too. Every day, I do what I can to take care of myself. I pay attention to detail. (Try to enjoy life.) The process matters; you'll get there eventually. Every day, I make progress to reach my goals. It's how you get there that counts."Joy is the sign that God is near." Laugh. Love people. Love you. Have hope. No matter what. He's a good God. Becoming toxic, complaining, dark, malicious, criminal -- all of this kills. It builds up over time, the toxicity. I've seen it and have experienced it from those who have meant me harm. They don't realize that it kills (i.e. bad health, cancer, ulcers, rage, hatred). It kills. It also kills the Spirit within. And they are the ones responsible for their own misery.
I win. They don't. (*wink*).
Oftentimes (now), I am amused at how far people will go to take another down just because they-are-HAPPY. "What power you give me," I think (snicker, snicker). I'm still going through a lot, but I'm also still growing, healing, loving, smiling, and laughing...in spite of some pain. Sometimes I feel exasperated, "WTF!!??! Argh!!!". But I'm not the "woe is me" type and never have been." Negative people, toxic, selfish, petty, ignorant, criminal, inhumane, in short, GHETTO. People, regardless of what or how much they do or do not have will always blame others like me for *their* M-I-S-E-R-Y (individual). Period.
Don't allow it. Period.
I believe in sharing information. I believe in sharing knowledge and I believe in self-empowerment. I believe that I set my own limitations if I choose to do so. Instead, I "live above [my] , circumstances." (Sarah Young, Jesus Calling.) I maintain my faith (my faith in God, in good people, in family (my brothers in particular), and in myself, something they have tried to beat out of me through their own filth. I haven't changed. I'm *not* going to change. Faith moves mountains. "The greatest act of faith is getting up and facing another day." Faith works wonders. Period. They haven't managed to beat the humanity out of me and never will.
Beat the odds.
....er...."Pearls of Wisdom"
*Stand straight and tall.
*Stop Violence Against Women. (Always.)
*"Joy is the sign that God is near."
*"Be vigilant in guarding your thoughts." Sarah Young, Jesus Calling.
"The curse of this age is overstimulation of the senses, which blocks out awareness of the unseen world." Sarah Young, Jesus Calling.
*Carino Inspira Carino.
*"Be with those that bring out the best in you, not the stress in you."--A knowledgeable person.
*"Focus is keeping your head when everyone around you is losing theirs." -- commercial, 5 hr energy drink
*Don't let your limitations overshadow your talents.--Fortune in a fortune cookie.
***"Be smart. Don't hide. Be Yourself." -Advice I received from a male worker from HELP Women's Resource Center, Brooklyn, New York
*"Knowledge of the Self is the mother of all knowledge." Khalil Gibran
*"Disarm: Be Yourself, Live a Little." Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*"Reclaim Your Autonomy", Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*"Stand Up and Be Counted." --a knowlegeable person
*Breathe. Reflect. Have fun. Vote!
*"Don't Compromise Yourself. You are all you've got." Janis Japlin.
*"I keep my ideals because in spite of everything, I still believe that people are basically good at heart." Anne Franke.
*"The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud."--Coco Chanel
*"Ultimately, love is self-approval." Sondray Ray
*"Holding Promise," A Work in Progress, Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*"Where do we find the Courage to Do What is Right?", Deploy Joy.
*"Redefining Your Basic Truths is a Catalyst for Change." Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*"[Enlighten You Intellect]."---Dr. P.M. Forni
*"Preserving Beauty, Preserving Life." -- A Work in Progress, Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*An antidote to dis-ease is? Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*Engage. Foster. Develop. Cultivate. Grow. Blossom.
*"Knowing More About the World Makes It A Safer Place." personalitycafe.com
*"Great spirits have always been opposed by violent opposition."--a world leader
*"Stop Listening to Bullshit." Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*Attitude is everything. Sylvia Lydia Morelos
*"Rise Above It." Tom Petty, Refugee
*Discipline Yourself.
*"You Are Here Not to Shrink Down to Less, but to Blossom Into More of Who You Really Are." --Oprah Winfrey.
*"In Being Ever So Limited." Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*"Combat the Uncivil With Knowledge." Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*"Today you are you. That Is Truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you." Dr. Seuss
*"To love beauty is to see light." --Victor Hugo
*"Open your eyes, look within; Are you satisfied with the life you're living?" Bob Marley
*"Man is free at the Moment He Wishes to Be." --Voltaire
*"By appreciation, we make excellence in others our own property." James Joyce
*"Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted."--John Lennon
*"Reward Yourself for Small Successes."--Legacy Health
***"The Vile Common: The Common Bile.", Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2012, 2014...
*"Seek My face with a teachable spirit." --God
*"There is a meaning to my non-madness.", Sylvia Lydia Morelos, 2014
*"The curse of this age is overstimulation of the senses, which blocks out awareness of the unseen world.", Sarah Young, Jesus Calling
*"Character is how you treat another who can do nothing for you." ---a knowledgeable person.
*"Intelligence + Character = [real] education. --Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
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